A Message from FFR

I thought it should read PEOPLE FOR ANIMALS (as that encompasses all of us) or better yet PEOPLE FOR ORGANISMS (as we wouldn’t want to exclude plants, fungi, parameciums …), but she said that if the OCCUPY folk were going to be omnipotent, then they may as well be schooled in who the true Goddesses really are (yes, just Goddesses as she tells me females rule the feline world).

Now all that aside, can someone please explain me the point of OCCUPYING the financial district on a weekend?  Seems to me they are missing their actual audience on the weekend and just irritating the neighbours and tourists.

Thanks Aziz!

If two totally different mammals can find a way to communicate peacefully with love, then why can’t we when it comes to bridging the gap between languages and cultural difference.  Seems we humans could learn a thing or two from these dolphins and this cat.

… like why I’m home alone on a Saturday night.  FUZZIES!!!!

In this particular closet, for example, I found the strangest assortment of items.  You can see the obvious yard-long party cups with juice jug, but she also has charcoal for her barbque, a keep-warm pizza bag, a tennis raquet, wrapping paper, sketch book and paints, a smore’s maker and more!  I plan on staging some type of intervention when Emme gets back and I am open to suggestions.  Perhaps there is someone we can get to come over and help her.  Maybe if I stage it as a make-over event she will feel more glam about the whole thing.

… and I say that as a gal whose kisses today came from a loving little Fuzzywiggle Furrypants Roo and blown from family members across the country.  May not have a ‘plus one’ in my world, but I do have a huge amount of love. Reminded everyday of that.

Valentines love and kisses,

Emme xoxo

Yep, that Irish Stud, Stephen Maguire, sent me a love song from across the pond in Ireland.  Well, in truth, his beautiful wife, Tera, sent me the love song, but she’s just as hot as he is, so works for me.

Next up, gotta get Stephen to serenade me in person.  That and get that sexy sweetheart Richard Yearwood to serenade Brie and I in person and on camera – he’s already done it once over the phone, but Fuzzies accidentally walked over my iphone and clicked delete.

I’m really rather fond of the goals I have in life.

Kisses,

Emme xoxo

Shhh!  Don’t tell Fuzzywiggle Furrypants Roo.  Wouldn’t want her disgusted at me on Christmas Day.

However, sometimes, during these dark but cozy hours, I am awoken by a deep kitty wisdom – a wisdom I know is as old as the world and as true – when the sky is still dark and the stairs are cold to the paw. Don’t ask me to explain it. As sophisticated as my cognitive powers are, I cannot be expected to articulate complex messages from the Beyond. It’s rather special that my little body can pick up supernatural currents like a purr-operated radio, even if the only message it communicates to me is a growly belly and a springy energy that tells me it is time to leave my boudoir (and for my two-legger to follow). I never argue with wisdom from the Beyond, especially if it thinks an early breakfast is of utmost importance.

A good sleeping companion makes all the difference (Photo by Jackie Fritsche)

Unfortunately my two-legger is rather skeptical of the Beyond and my interpretation of it. I would be offended by her reluctance to obey the power behind my growling belly if I didn’t know she was a dullard as far as the dark-sky currents of kitty wisdom are concerned. She just doesn’t know any better. And so I must patiently persuade her to emerge at a darker hour than she is wont, though she may grumble and groan sleepily. My persuasion strategy involves announcing my wakefulness repeatedly in a pitch she cannot ignore, and when all else fails, I nuzzle her. My nuzzles have a curious power over my two-legger, and they are very useful at times like these. After a few well-administered nuzzles we are invariably padding down the stairs towards my favourite cupboard.

As I enjoy my breakfast, I hear the clink of cups and things in the kitchen, which means my two-legger is joining me in my ritual! I pat myself on the back. I am training her well. Soon she will bound down the stairs with me for this divinely ordained ceremony. I am happy. I will nuzzle my two-legger for this.

I was enjoying my day’s first siesta on a warm sofa spot with my two-legger. She was employed in some unimportant task and nestled by my side, when the doorbell rang. I stirred in protest as my two-legger rose to attend to the intrusion. I thought I had trained her well enough to know that strangers are not welcome – rather they are FORBIDDEN – during nap time. But instead of my two-legger turning the hopeful at the door away in hushed tones as she should have, she issued an enormous whoop and welcome for the uninvited visitor (as if the doorbell hadn’t disturbed me enough).

Not Amused (Photo by Clint Gardner)

Before I had a moment to process that my very own two-legger had betrayed me by allowing a stranger into my sleepy boudoir, I was unceremoniously jerked into an unknown lap. All this without so much as a “by-your-leave”. But that was not the end of it – soon after I was betrayed and woken, I proceeded to suffer the indignities of rough and inexperienced petting, the details of which I cannot bear to describe. The miscreant guest smelled like canine and mauled like the worst possible two-legger a cat might cross paths with at the best of times – and this, as you may have gathered, was not the best of times.

I did what any such assaulted feline would do: I inserted the claws as far as possible into the offender’s lap, allowing myself to escape during his yelping. As I seethed in my secret hiding place (upstairs) I thought about all the things I should have, could have said to him in the heat of the moment to properly repay him for his behaviour. As I’m sure you have experienced, I found myself full of appropriately livid responses after the opportunity had passed.

I write this in warning to that canine-smelling creature that dared disturb my slumber, and others like him, if such exist. I expect villains like him travel in packs and dwell in some shadowy hideout, far away from the long arm of the law. If ever he or his kind dare(s) to casually “drop by” as happened today, I will be ready to deliver justice, on behalf of all rudely-awakened felines. I assure you that next time, I will be prepared to punish the fellow mercilessly, as is his due. Until then, I wait and prowl.

~FFR