The Life & Miss-Adventures of Emme Rogers
Was rather delighted when I read this tweet this evening:
“SUPER CUTE and SUPER TALENTED!!! Emme Rogers”
I was just a little perplexed by the rest of the tweet though.
“(owners/handlers Beth and Mort) . . . what will you accomplish in…”
… so I clicked on the link before blowing kisses to the tweeter. This is what I found …
Courtesy of TOPS Veterinary Rehabilitation
Seems I have a canine namesake and while I’ve never won a Beauty Pagent, she has. Hmph!
I seem to have a knack for attracting critters and weirdo bugs. They must smell my fear! It’s either that or someone has planted a hidden camera chip in me, and is getting a huge kick out of my reactions to the ridiculous situations I find myself in. Emme Rogers has enjoyed her share of laughs at my expense and has attempted to fuel the fire by suggesting I combine dining and insects. It’s a good thing I have friends who are on my side and kids who find her challenges insulting. They set out to help me prove something to her. Unfortunately for me, I think she’ll have the last laugh.
My friends came up with the idea to cook up some fresh crab and enjoy a night in with garlic butter and wine. I had eaten crab legs before so I thought the whole thing sounded pretty good, except for the fact that crabs remind me of spiders. Oh well, I figured my friends would lead the way, I would drink the wine and look the other way most of the time. They did make me go shopping with them to buy the crab though. We went down to a marina area so we could pretend like we ‘caught’ our own fresh dinner. A lovely man reached into the hundred-leg tank and pulled out a huge crab like it was nothing. The next thing that happened let me know this night was going to be more than I was prepared for; my girlfriend asked how to cook it. I thought they had done this before! When I heard the man say what we had to do I knew I was going to have to be involved, that this would be a group project and I could not hide from it.
Just Look At All Those Legs Crawling Around In There!
Learning How to Hold a Crab
It's Really Happening, A Fresh Crab For Dinner!
We ran through the plan all the way home. Take the crab out of the paper…pick it up in the right way to avoid the pinching claws, hit it REALLY hard on the middle of the sink to crack the shell instantly and have it be over with…remove the top shell and discard the parts we don’t want…boil it…eat it. Of course the kids caught wind of our excitement and gathered around, refusing to miss our attempt at this.
Take the crab out of the paper: The crab slid right into the sink and turned around to stare at us. I have never looked a crab in the face before and I think we all froze for a moment.
The Stare Down
Pick it up the right way: My friend’s husband was designated to do this. He kept going for it, but could not commit. Finally he made the move. He did it all wrong and it was totally awkward, but he managed to get it into position.
Trying To Hold It Right
Hit it REALLY hard on the middle of the sink: We missed the REALLY part and ended up with a sort of tap. The crab jumped out of my friend’s hands and back into the sink and ran around like crazy with it’s big angry claws. Oh the screams! The kids were screaming, we were screaming, the kids ran away, and we kept screaming. Eventually we stopped, drank a lot of wine, and composed ourselves enough to try again. Success! Then it hit us, we had to do it two more times because we had 3 crabs altogether. We got smart and kept the other two in the paper until the deed was done.
In the end after drinking more wine to forget everything, I was actually able to enjoy our meal. It was really hard to eat it after I just saw it running around. I did spill garlic butter everywhere trying to get the meat out of the leg, but no one can dispute the fact that I was an active participant in a crazy dining experience.
“These boots were made for walking,
And that’s just what they’ll do …”
Photographer: Liz Kearsley
It’s been a long time and many hints in coming, but I am pleased to finally introduce Roamancing in Alpha …
… the site ~ http://roamancing.com
… on twitter ~ http://twitter.com/roamancing
… facebook ~ http://facebook.com/roamancing
… youtube ~ http://youtube.com/roamancing
Just the beginning of what promises to be many a tale of shenanigans and debauchery from the likes of Brie Mason, Sir Von Ritter, Clippernolan, Hummingbird604, Thu Nguyen, Katrina Ham, Alyzee Lakhani, Richard Yearwood, Kelly Lui, Summer, myself and many more whose identies we are keeping undercover just for now.
Smooches from the road,
Emme xoxo
You may have noticed that despite this site bearing my name, our list of writers writing here is growing, this is partially as I have so many talented friends, like Brie and Rob Jones, who enjoy writing here; partly due to Ahimsa Media’s goal of fostering young storytellers, like Alyzee, Summer and Kelly; and as we are getting set to launch Roamancing, which will involve a number of storytellers, but has been temporarily delayed by the ups & downs that life throws at you.
With this, we have found our writers have spread out across North America for the summer, which means opportunities for us to cover the Arts beyond Vancouver. While our core team will still be in and around Vancouver this summer, I (Emme) will be based in Southern Ontario, Hamilton to be specific, and Brie will be in LA.
Stacey Robinsmith and I at the Canadian Premiere of Nixon in China at the Vancouver Opera.
So if you have an arts event (theatre, music, fashion, food & beverage …) that you’d like one of our writers to attend and weave a tale around, fire me a note at emme@emmerogers.com and I will see if someone is eager and available.
As for me, you know I absolutely adore theatre, music, the opera … and would love to check out this scene in Ontario, along with looking forward to checking out the Gimli Film Festival for the first time in Manitoba in a little over a week’s time.
Brie loves theatre and music too, but she also adores dance and fashion, and with Young Master Mason and Little Miss Mason in the wings, I know would enjoy taking in some events that are suited to families with 9 – 12 year olds too.
Vancouver – you are already, of course, familiar with the types of storytelling that our Vancouver Cats, like Rob Jones and Alyzee Lakhani, are capable of for music and theatre.
Hanging with Ron Sexsmith & Rob Jones - two of my music legends.
Looking forwarding to sampling a few new flavours this summer.
Kisses,
Emme xoxo
After mine and Emme’s attempt to peel onions in preparation for Bob Blumer’s go at breaking the world onion peeling record, I got inspired. My win over Emme gave me some confidence and I thought I might really have something special in the kitchen. With Glutton for Punishment coming to an end after 5 incredible seasons, I thought I would start something new for myself. I decided to embark on a journey similar to Julie and Julia, but call it Brie and Bob. Once I realized that would have me wrestling a 50 pound catfish, chasing a cheese-wheel down a cliff in England, and detoxifying a deadly poisonous blowfish in Japan, I decided to just make Bob’s salsa instead. This proved to be enough of an adventure in itself, but I am quite proud of the delicious results and I plan to win hummingbird604′s Glutton for Punishment contest with my experience. Now I know how much I need the DVD sets of the show!
I learned something very important while making this salsa. It’s really lousy to be a slow chopper! I don’t mind that I had to hunt down all the ingredients (well, a really nice grocery man helped me-I think I looked lost), or pay a lot more than pre-made, store-bought salsa, but I felt like a real let-down that it took me 23 min just to chop the tomatoes. I thought I would serve it up during some family TV time, but instead I was running to the kitchen on commercials to chop the onions and herbs and ended up having the whole salsa ready for bedtime. When everyone went to sleep, I stayed up and ate my salsa. I loved it, and everything turned out for the best, as it tasted even better for the family the next day after all the flavours had hung out in the jar in the fridge all night. I now have a new side focus though. I am going to learn how to chop fast. I want to invite Emme to join me but she is a real danger in the kitchen. I need Bob to give me some tips!
