FFR’s Wiley Weekly Word: Dalliance

A leisurely meow to all you cats out there. I do plan on writing great feline words of wisdom a little more frequently, but as a superior being you can’t possibly begin to understand the great pressures weighing on our time.  As of late, the least of which has been healing my two-legger from her spring time dalliance.  But why am I explaining this to you?   You’re just a mere two-legger and on that note, back to our tutelage…

So this week’s word:  Dalliance

Dalliance: The silly, totally frivolous and often trifling activities that two-leggers get up to in the Spring and Summer, most of the time with amorous intentions in mind.

‘My two-legger is usually quite an intelligent creature (well as far as two-leggers go), but when this involves dalliance I have to close my eyes and ears to avoid witnessing the disaster that ensues. Does she not understand as a female (the superior sex, of course) that she should lay back and let the male two-legger perform the dalliance? They do after all seem to enjoy the chase. And then she’d end up with less egg on her face when its all said and done.’

One alley cat that is often doing acts of dalliance to catch my eye.

One alley cat that is often doing acts of dalliance to catch my eye.

FFR

Kitty Memoires

This brings me fond memories of Fuzzywiggle Furrypants youth:

FFR’s Wiley Weekly Word: Hankering

I know I haven’t been instilling feline wisdom in you for a few weeks, but I was in a bit of a spat with my two-legger.  SHE went to see Beams and his two-legger without me.  The nerve!!!!  Does she not know …  Okay I’m stopping myself, because I’m above that.  In fact, I’ve decided to insert the claws, because today is the day that the two-leggers call Mother’s Day and although us felines don’t really have a word for ‘mother’, this is what my two-legger calls herself.  I think it means ‘bringer of food, cleaner of mess and most fantastic cuddler’.

So this week’s word:  Hankering

Hankering: A yearning or longing, like the kind that happens in the pants of a two-legged male during the Spring.

‘Two-Legger, Lord Likely’s pants often display the signs of a hankering and not only in the Spring.  Based on the strut that Lord Likely has around my two-legger. I’d say he has a hankering for her, but then again he struts like that around all female two-leggers.’

Right now I have a hankering to give my two-legger a cuddle, especially since shes upset over her Mom. Hate seeing her upset.  Photo by Lola May.

Right now I have a hankering to give my two-legger a cuddle, especially since she's upset over her Mom. Hate seeing her upset. Photo by Lola May.

FFR’s Wiley Weekly Word: Cacophony

This week’s word:  Cacophony

Cacophony: A mix of sounds so horrendous that they cause us felines to yowl and hide.

‘Some two-leggers think that the feline mating ritual causes a cacophony.  Admittedly, I do know a few Tom Cats that are quite boisterous in their singing, but if the two-leggers were smart enough to understand feline, then they’d realize that really this is beautiful love duet that is being sung.’

Baby two-leggers have a tendency to create a cacophony. Picture by Adrian Donatien

Baby two-leggers have a tendency to create a cacophony. Picture by Adrian Donatien

FFR

FFR’s Wiley Weekly Word: Beldam

This week’s word: Beldam

Beldam: Ancient two-legger of the female persuasion that hopefully has a good personality, as she is hard on the eyes.

‘I find it amusing to call my two-legger a beldam, not because she is ugly (she’s actually rather beautiful to me both inside and out), but because ‘she who prides herself on words’ misinterprets this word.  She thinks I am meowing ‘belle dame’, which is French for ‘beautiful woman’, so affection and treats are showered upon me.  Oh the irony of it all.’

Clearly a belle dame, not a beldam.

Clearly a 'belle dame', not a 'beldam'.

FFR