It’s almost like Serena Ryder wrote this as a sound track of my summer and the 5 or so years leading up to it:
If anyone happens to have a road map to the men in my world, I’d greatly appreciate your sharing it with me.
New Tactics and Strategies in Dating
June 27, 2010 By Leave a Comment
Post the Germany vs England footie match this morning (Sorry England … Germany, I’m raising a pint of coffee to you), I was still watching the CBC, and Peter Mansbridge started exploring the growing concern over obesity in society, especially with young people. Seems a fair bit of the concern is for increased health issues as overweight young people grow older and greater levels of concern in looking after themselves as they become seniors. I listen to this and I glance down at my round belly, something I never had until this year.
Week One: The Beginning Shot to the New Year's Resolution
Some of you will remember my New Year’s Resolution to tone this up for my own well being, and will also remember that that DOESN’T mean dieting, but rather healthy living – good food, fresh air and exercise. The good food part comes easily to me. Unlike concern over increased consumption of processed food on the CBC, I was brought up on home cooking and have taken that into my adult life. Where I’ve been struggling is that although I grew up outdoors, more and more I spend my days working in sedentary conditions at a computer, and whilst I started the year out with a healthy dose of fresh air and exercise, that went downhill with the month long Olympic Party, fueled with a healthy dose of hops and barley. So as I revisited my Wheel of Life with my personal coach, Jennifer Priest, the other week, I noticed that I am still struggling to find a healthy balance in fun and recreation (which I consider to include exercise) and romance. And I think the two go hand in hand. I need to get OUT and be active way more than I am.
My Wheel of Life: January 2010
Some of you will recall that I’ve been experimenting with online dating for the past year or so, and whilst I was meeting some lovely men, it wasn’t really working for me. Partially because I am a romantic and this was a rather contrived way to meet people, and partially because I spend my days working online and the last thing I want to do at night is to go back to the computer to create a personal life for myself. It wasn’t working and I told Jennifer as much in our last session. She had some great alternative suggestions.
A few ideas of Jennifer‘s to get me OUT and active and meeting people all at the same time are to:
- Go to the Driving Range after work and hit a few balls.
- Find a Hiking Group and join them for weekend hikes.
- Go for a walk on my own or borrow a friend’s dog to take for a walk and actually make eye contact, smile and say ‘hello’ to people when I am out and about (scary concept for the VanCity cats, I know).
- Join a Team Sport, with people I don’t know, like beach volleyball or dragon boating.
Not so outdoorsy, but goes well with the non-processed food, healthy eating part of my New Year’s Resolution, Jennifer also suggested singles cooking classes. Definitely trying that one out.
Loving these ideas! Especially as they get me outdoors and active and outside my comfort zone of my true blue friends (whom I love and adore, but am very quickly becoming the crazy spinster aunt to all their children). Off to try my first one today (after the footie match that just started). Found a hiking group and am going on my first hike with them. Wish me luck!
Kisses,
Emme xoxo
Compromised
January 31, 2010 By 4 Comments
So a little while ago, I poised this question and posted this twitter poll:
I am sure it won’t come as any great surprise that there was a reason for my query and even less surprising that I harbour an opinion. You see, I have a friend that I believe is in an unhealthily controlling relationship (in the lover kind of sense). She has become a shadow of herself. Of course, she doesn’t see this and sees me as the one with a problem as I’m not in a relationship. She told me relationships are all about compromises.
So my opinion? I whole heartedly disagree. I think healthy relationships are accepting and celebrating in one another’s differences. It is our differences that make relationships interesting and help us grow as people. Of course, to accept one another’s differences, communication is key and you can’t always have things your way. You need to do things with your lover in mind.
Photo by Adam Foster
Why does compromise scare me so much? The majority of you, that are likely (unlike me) in a relationship, said compromise is key, yet I continue to dig my heels in the sand and disagree. Compromise scares me, because I see my friend losing herself. She is compromising all of herself and has become a shadow of herself. I see this, not only because I love her, but because I was losing myself to compromise in my last relationship and it terrifies me that if I was still there that I would have lost myself by now. Don’t get me wrong, despite being a Princess from time-to-time, I do understand the need for compromise and don’t always have to have things my way (that’s only the other 90% of the time). Where the danger lies is in when you start to compromise yourself. Too much compromise is a very dangerous thing.
Anyhow, those are my 2 cent.
What Do You Believe Builds a Healthy Relationship?
January 1, 2010 By 6 Comments
Got into a healthy New Year’s Eve debate last night on how one should healthily approach a relationship with their lover. Curious to know what all you sexy devils think. Pick the answer that rings the most true to you or click on other and customize your own answer. Looking forward to seeing the results!
