Not So Sexy Moments: The Belly Button

A long time ago, I decided that somebody needed to talk about those embarrassing predicaments that as women (and as people) we all manage to find ourselves in from time to time, so the rest of us would know its not just us and what to do.  And seeing as I have ended up the brunt of the joke and with egg on my face far too many times to count, I thought – ‘Why the Hell not. What do I have to lose?’  In fact, I would even go so far as to say talking about things like diarrhea makes me that much sexier, as it make me that much more ‘real’, not to mention ‘honest’ (or at least thats what I’m telling myself).

So today’s not so sexy topic – the belly button.  Why the belly button?  Because I discovered mine was all red and sore a couple of weeks back.  Now being me, I did what made perfect sense at the time.  Ignore it and it will go away.  Not surprisingly I often approach car issues with the same strategy and not surprisingly this tactic never seems to work.

So what happened?  Well, I start to wonder why is my belly so tender to the touch (thats right I touch my belly, and no you can’t, well at least you can’t until maybe date #….. – I can’t give away all my mysteries) – oh yeah back to sore to touch belly.  So I check out my bare belly and what do I see, but 8 tiny reindeer … oh hang on thats another story.  No I see a big red swollen mass where my rather cute (if I do say so myself) belly button normally resides.  And on closer inspection its oozing, noxious smelling liquids. Not good, not good at all.

Now I admittedly hate going to the doctors, but they were already closed anyhow and I didn’t think this quite deemed emergency room visit even if I did have a date that night (I didn’t really, I just wanted to say that).  So whats a gal to do?  Well crack open a great big research manual on the internet of course.  And shockingly I discovered theres not really any great info out there on infected belly buttons from reputable sources and that which there is seems to contradict each other, so I pieced through what was there and used my common sense (yes, despite popular belief I do have some).  At any rate my remedy cleared everything up in three days, so in the absence of a reputable source of belly button infection advice, I’m going to share mine:

1. Night One: 1) Gently wash the lovely smelling puss out of your belly button. 2) Mix 1 tbsp of salt in a bowl full of water. Then lie back and pour a bit over your belly button. Let sit for a few minutes.  It will sting.  3) Rinse off and gently dry.
2. Night Two: No puss to be seen or smelt – yay!  But still tender.  1) Gently washed with the face wash I use for my eczema. (Particular brand – Spectro Jel Extra Gentle Skin Cleanser) 2) Rinse off and gently dry.
3. Night Three: No longer tender! But repeated Night Twos Cleaning Regime.

Happy to say that my belly button is back to resembling the one above.

Kisses,

Emme xoxo

PS Everything I read suggested that if it doesn’t clear up, you need to see a doctor, as the infection can get in your blood stream.