Meant to write sooner, but all that free time that the holidays were proposing to give me to write, to share and to edit some silly videos for the site were spent with my nose in a book, cooking, curled up and chatting with Mom, or enjoying some wine or a nice port with Dad. Most relaxing!
So who am I? I am a 33 (at least while I am writing this) year old writer / producer, who occasionally does some acting to entertain herself. I have a brother and a sister – affectionately known as Motor Mouth and Bella – and a huge number of furry family members, only one of which lives with me – Miss Roo, a goddess in the guise of a feline. When asked where I am from – the answer is Canada – having lived all across the country, I am proud to say I have been shaped by this country’s diverse regions and cultures. Currently I reside in Vancouver and my brother and sister are both in the big smoke in Ontario.
Growing up I was very much a tomboy, which has resulted in me possessing very few girl skills – I can manage to take a comb through my hair, put my hair in a ponytail, and only know how to apply make up as a questionably gay gentleman taught me when I first started acting. To this day I still find it much easier to befriend guys, although I do have some amazing female friends in life, like Lola and Kittyn, it just takes me longer to make these friendships. My natural comfort with men, often gets me into trouble as inevitably somewhere along the way with most, but not all, someones feelings get confused. And in truth most of the men I have been with, have been some of my best friends. To be honest, although I have been on the odd date, I’ve never really learnt how to date or become all that comfortable with it, as usually I just end up kissing one of the men I am close to.
Past Relationships – there have certainly been some interesting ones. First kiss was at camp on the East Coast – can’t remember his name, but can picture him. Actually to be honest, I lost a bet with the next door neighbour (a year younger than me) at around the age of 10 and had to kiss him behind the bed to pay up on my bet. Was asked to go steady for the first time that same year and threatened at the same time that he and his buddies would terrorize my friends if I said no. I said “no” and the rest of the year was marked by playground wars. When he wasn’t at school, he’d ride his bike across town to try and find me at home, only to be disappointed and have cookies and milk with my Mom. As for camp on the East Coast – lost track of my first kiss, but became good buddies with one of my chum’s first kisses. He was older and showed up the following summer with diamond earrings for me. I was shocked and didn’t feel the same way, so I gave them back. Broke the poor boy’s heart.
My first “relationship” was the older brother of one of my buds, Mr. Moneybags. Was totally frugal with anyone but me. With me he’d try to flaunt his money and lavish me with gifts. To this day am still turned off by men that try and impress me with their money. Really guys – what kind of woman do you want that would be attracted to you for your money!?! Dated the Head Boy after that – he was more my style – down to earth, smart and funny. Got really sick that year and had to take a month off school and because I couldn’t hold down any food, one of my friends thought it would be funny to tell people that I was pregnant and had an abortion. And people actually believed it!!! I hadn’t even had sex!!!! To this day, I am sure there are still people from high school that believe that.
My first love came at the age of 17. Broke his heart (and mine), because I was moving out West and didn’t want to fall any harder. Stupidly decided to date one of his best friends shortly there after for a week (slipped him his first tongue – that was really rather funny to see the look of terror in his eyes) before I realized I had my feelings confused. That was an ugly mistake, that resulted in my first and hopefully last lovers triangle. Moral of that story: men that are in love you and feel jilted don’t think very clearly and never ever get in a car with a man that is that angry at you. Think I lost one of my lives that night.
First stalker came the same year. Also ugly. He was 10 years older than me and my boss. Never truly got rid of him until he got married about 10 years after that. My parents happily offered to hold the wedding at their house.
After the lovers triangle, I never really had any meaningful relationship until I lost my grandfather. Had started casually dating a fellow just before hand and end up in incredible shock and mourning that resulted in me having sex for the first time, because I was numb and didn’t want to be alone (he didn’t even realize I was a virgin) and my saying “yes – I’ll move in with you”. Don’t really feel like getting into that one, but lets just say that I never pictured myself in bad thriller involving an abusive relationship and an attempted murder. Kind of think of that as somebody else’s life. The one good thing from it though, is that unlike some women my age, I am not desperate to jump into any old relationship just because the clock is ticking. I know, I am happier on my own than with the wrong person.
Don’t get me wrong – it would be lovely to meet someone that I’d like to grow old with, but it has to be the right someone. So who is the right someone? Can’t say exactly. I do know though, that while at one time, I thought I didn’t have a type – I now know I do. So here it is –
- Physique (doesn’t matter – I have dated men of all different shapes, sizes and ethnicities – I do need to be physically attracted to them though)
- Big Heart
- Compassionate / Caring
- Sense of Humour (if I guy doesn’t have this, then I will likely drive him nuts)
- Has some sort of ambition or drive (I am sick of men hitting on me, that would be happy to live off of me. Men – what is wrong with you!?!? Have you no pride?)
- A Best Friend
Oh and someone within 10 years of me. I have some lovely older gentlemen in my life, whose friendships I cherish, but I want someone that I can grow old with. I am already worried enough about my parents health without being married to someone who is closer in age to them than to me. We are just at different points in our lives with different desires.
And on that note I am going to bid you all adeiu!