Hello furless wonders,
Welcome to my new space. Well mine, & I guess my human’s, new space.
I think we may have gotten off on the wrong foot on Sexy in Vancity, as I really am rather adorable. I mean I am purrfect after all. I just get a little cranky when Kittyn is around. She has a tendency to stroke me the wrong way and make my hair stand up on end. And the nerve to call herself ‘Kittyn’!!! I mean really! How can you possibly be so arrogant as to give yourself a name so fabulously feline when you’re a mere two-legger.
As far as two-leggers go, I have to admit I am rather fond of mine. She’s not purrfect, like me, but then she’s not a cat. She can’t sit still for very long, forgets to serve me the bowls of icy cold milky stuff first, and has a tendency to go out gallivanting for ridiculously long stretches, as opposed to attending to all my needs, like a good human should. She does, however, cuddle rather nicely, so I suppose I can overlook her short comings.
I am concerned about her writing as of late though. She keeps writing about Vancouver events, radio shows and films and I really do find them to be rather a bore. I am so much more worldly than that and I do want her to finish her book so that she keeps me well fed in the finest of feline cuisine along with the rather sumptuous tandoori chicken from the meat man down the road. It is for these reasons that I feel that it is important for me to become her muse and start swatting her into action (I do, of course, mean literally). In this endeavor, I’m starting my own weekly column – Wiley Weekly Word.
This Week’s Word: Abscond
Abscond: To suddenly & secretly disappear, so as not to get caught. (ie. Think golden slobbering canine and an unwatched slab of meat)
‘My human tries to abscond with a bowl of icy cool milky stuff in the dead of night, but alas she lacks the prowess & stealth of the feline (rather she sounds a little like a clutsy elephant), so is none too secretive about her crime (because it is a crime to eat icy cool milky stuff without sharing it with the feline Goddess).’